1/10/2022 daddy issuesunder the hood of a record player lies a photo of you.
young, tall, beautiful you. with long blonde hair you passed down to two and eyes just like mine, a deep greenish-blue. this woman in the mirror is never me but always you. I am 21 now and everything you hate, fragile, tattooed, and completely unafraid, but still a carbon-copy of the man who never stayed. you, you, infallible you. why you never cared to love me, I will never know, stuck with an inherited temper I’ll never fully outgrow and deep-rooted daddy issues that will forever be the star of my show. did you really have to go? I am 21 now and have so much to tell you. like I kept all the records and the letters and the books we traded so long ago. I want to tell you how my heart breaks when I see fathers with their daughters because I can’t remember the last time you treated me like I was yours and how I have to choke back tears when I pass a golf course because you never taught me how to play and how I still stop dead in my tracks at the sight of bald men with sour looks on their faces because I always hope its you but it never is. I remember my four year old hand wrapped around your finger. I am 21 now and all I have of you is the sting of your blood in my veins and a useless photo of you. young, tall, beautiful you. but I look at that guy and I feel nothing. Comments are closed.
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